So last Friday I took advantage of "Summer Fridays," the period between Memorial Day and Labor Day, where those in fashion or fashion related industries either work only half day or not at all on Friday. I love it. It may be one of the best perks. My homie lover friend had informed me earlier in the week that he wanted to take me out for a really special dinner. All I had to do was show up. I slept until noon, got a fresh cut and paired my fresh and rested face with a light weight slate grey summer suit, a casual, but crisp, white button down, chucks and a driving cap. I met him in Soho for dinner at Woo Lae Oak - an amazing Korean restaurant. He took the liberty of order for us. We started with Jang Au Gui; broiled eel in a sweet Soy Sauce. The presentation was great, as the ell was served on hot river stones which rested on a bed of sea salt. We followed that up with Korean Barbeque… we choose the salmon and the sea scallops. Each table is equipped with a smokeless grill - so we were responsible for grilling the salmon and sea scallops. They were seasoned to perfection. We added a couple of more dishes to our dinner and ended it by ordering three deserts - tropical snow, a green apple sorbet and a caramelized pear. It was one of the best dates I have had.
Let's fast forward to this Friday, where things have dramatically changed. Although we have spent everyday together since Sunday and they have been great day, emotional, but great, I have arrived at the place where I am no longer interested in being with someone that can't be with me in totality. I can't believe I wrote it… lol. As incredible as he is, I have to remove myself from what I feel to be is an unhealthy relationship. Maybe we just had bad timing. Maybe I needed him to show me what I really want from someone. Maybe you can have more than one soul mate. I'm not going to make some dramatic departure. We bought advance tickets to see films on Saturday and Sunday that are apart of New Fest, New York's LGBT Film Festival. After that I will slowly push back, maybe start dating again and throw myself into a few projects. This situation has allowed me to make some good decisions. Finally telling some of my close friends that I was gay, and finally deciding that the time is now for me to have that conversation with my parents. He is all about music and he exposed me a Chaka Khan song that plays on repeat in my ipod and it sums it all up:
You know it hurts me
Let's fast forward to this Friday, where things have dramatically changed. Although we have spent everyday together since Sunday and they have been great day, emotional, but great, I have arrived at the place where I am no longer interested in being with someone that can't be with me in totality. I can't believe I wrote it… lol. As incredible as he is, I have to remove myself from what I feel to be is an unhealthy relationship. Maybe we just had bad timing. Maybe I needed him to show me what I really want from someone. Maybe you can have more than one soul mate. I'm not going to make some dramatic departure. We bought advance tickets to see films on Saturday and Sunday that are apart of New Fest, New York's LGBT Film Festival. After that I will slowly push back, maybe start dating again and throw myself into a few projects. This situation has allowed me to make some good decisions. Finally telling some of my close friends that I was gay, and finally deciding that the time is now for me to have that conversation with my parents. He is all about music and he exposed me a Chaka Khan song that plays on repeat in my ipod and it sums it all up:
You know it hurts me
When I can't be next to you
And though we're young I know
You feel the same way, too
Deep in our hearts we know
It's just a matter of time
'Cause we'll be together one day
And when we met
Out on the streets along the way
It wasn't by chance that we
Were passing by that day
As sure as there's a moon
And stars above I know
We'll be together for sure
As sure as that nose on your face
We were meant for each other's arms
Just as one and one make two
You were made for me
I was made for you (boy)
Don't try to hide that smile
I know that's on your face
And when you stare (look) at me
I'll look the other way
And we won't give away
What we know from the start
That we've got that love in our hearts
Deep in our hearts
In our hearts we've got that love
In our hearts we've got that love
In our hearts we've got that love
Oh deep down in our hearts
We've got that love
Oh we're very into lovin', yeah
Oh that love in our hearts
We've got that love in our hearts
Oh baby, we've got that love
2 comments:
Wow... Thanks for coming by! I love this blog... I love this blog... I can't wait to here about the progression of situation... Please take it slow and let things happen. While you may be on one page, HLF may be someone else entirely.. I am a firm believer in accepting people for who they are and situations for what they are.
personally i've never experienced what you're going through, but i have felt the pain of wanting someone that i can't have. so i guess i have gone through somewhat what you're dealing with. lol. at least to a certain extent.
man i say do what's best for you. what might feel right today may end up being quite detrimental in the long run. and i know that must sound so cliche, but its true. sometimes you've got to look out for you and if he isn't coming around then maybe its time for you to sit down with yourself and evaluate.
but hey i am with my man above, i look forward to the unfolding of this story.
& thanks for coming through at my spot. i am glad that you seem to like what i have to say.
i am quite invested in your blog as of today myself. so thank you for recruiting me over here. you're quite an interesting unique individual based upon what i have read.
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